Zak Orth

Accountant

Gregory

Adam

Randall

David Newbert

Adam

Mike

J.J.

Renfield

Waiter With Pole

Curtis

Warren

Narrator (voice)

Peter

Monk Jablonski

Deputy Abel Martinson

Paul Faber

Barge Michaelson

An Abernathy Cousin

Cody Santimonio

Wendall Wimms

Don Ohlmeyer

Douglas Clayborne

Brad

Butch

Self

Zip (voice)

Josh

Quinny

Keith

Self

Nuns Gone Wild Host

Manny

Porter Canby

Presto

Turkey Hunter / Christmas Caroler / Inspector / Enos / Friend

Officer Cameron

Wally Parkers

Mr. Ricardi

Gabe Coleman

Roy McComb

Steve Fratti

Young Priest

Jim Owens

J.J.

Alfred C. Baldwin III

Drew Meyers

Aaron Pittman

Howie

Bill Boerg

James McHenry

J.J.

Dad (voice)